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If we can agree that our number one priority in life is to know ourselves (so we may consciously create this lovely life of ours according to our own desires and rules), then can we also agree that there will be times when knowing ourselves requires us to undo ourselves?
To undo norms and habits we have that no longer are working for us.
To undo beliefs that are not in line with what we want to create.
To undo ways of being that aren’t…quite…right anymore.
“What you think you are is a belief to be undone.” ~ A Course in Miracles
A Story of Undoing…
When I was in my 20’s, I had an eating disorder. I controlled food and exercise so that I could feel good on the outside. All while killing everything on my inside.
At 26, I walked into my first 12 step meeting and my season of recovery began. Immediately, I began to pull back the layers of beliefs, habits and attitudes I had developed.
???? I had to completely undo my relationship with food. I looked head-on at the habits and beliefs I had developed around food…and challenged them, invited them to exit…told them they were no longer welcome (Sorry, Diet Coke…no more drinking you to trick my body into believing it’s not hungry!). I learned about nutrition and the energy and nourishment food gave me (1 apple + peanut butter made my body feel good and whole). I began to experiment with new ways of interacting with food (No, I didn’t have to eat anything just because someone offered or made it for me. Food could be emotionally neutral). I actively addressed and dissolved food norms that were part of my childhood and created new stories about food that felt better (no, I didn’t have to ‘finish everything on my plate,’ or ‘eat my money’s worth,’ anymore).
I journaled a lot. 😉 Processed. Talked it out. For years.
???? I had to completely undo my relationship with my body. I had to look at the swirling societal, personal and familial beliefs that were jumbled inside of me, telling me what my body should be. I had to unravel the “good looking” body that was a result of my eating disorder and dance with her a bit, feeling around for what was real and what was not. What I should keep and what I should release. I had to learn the truth of my body…what felt good to her and what did not.
What happens after the “undoing?”
Like a flower, I plucked these petals of beliefs and habits off of me one by one.
Until I was just a naked stem. Ready to grow new leaves.
From a blank slate.
Completely free to create a new flower that was 100% ME.
Now…it was about letting ME be revealed to me as I sunk deep into oneness with myself. It was about discovering ME.
“What you really are must be revealed to you.” ~ A Course in Miracles
How do you know you’re ready for Undoing?
It’s not a question of if. It’s a question of when. Seasons of undoing are inevitable. Just like a snake shedding its skin that no longer fits…you must shed your old self in order to transcend into the next, beautiful version of you. So, how do you know you might be ready?
You’re uncomfortable. Something’s not sitting right with you. Possibly over and over again.
You find yourself complaining about the same thing over and over again.
You’re anxious often.
You’re angry often.
You’re depressed often.
These uncomfortable experiences are all gifts in their ability to flag our soul’s deep desire for alignment and peace.
So, get quiet with yourself and listen.
It Ain’t Gonna Be Pretty
And this is where the hard work begins.
Undoing is ugly. It’s very uncomfortable. It can be painful.
It’s shining the light of honesty right into our eyes and excavating all that is there, believing that the light won’t blind us…but will actually help us see better.
It challenges our beliefs. Our identity. Our world view.
Which is why it’s so important to have trusted people around you who will be tender with you. Who will hold you when your dark parts are revealed.
During my eating disorder recovery, I had a sponsor that I spoke to almost every day.
And during recent seasons of undoing, I’ve surrounded myself with a few soul sisters and my husband who have given me the space to come undone without judgment.
Bless these angels.
Becoming (More) You
Why do we undo ourselves? So that we may evolve into the next authentic versions of ourselves.
And that’s the point.
To fully BE you. During every season of your life.
So if you’re finding yourself uncomfortable right now, undoing beliefs and ways of being that are no longer working for you, and tuning into what really aligns with the next version of you…
I see you.
And I’m proud of you.
You’re doing the work.
The Undoing of You
The shutters that come,
When you’re coming undone,
Ripple through body and soul.
You’re tearing away,
From what once was okay,
And you feel so out of control.
PAUSE
Don’t worry, my friend,
This season will end,
As soon as you allow the unrest.
It’s uncomfortable, sure,
It feels like a blur,
But I promise, it’s for the best.
PAUSE
The undoing of you,
Unraveling what no longer feels right.
Tune in so you can hear,
What now brings you delight.
LONG PAUSE
So root yourself down,
Deep into the ground,
Hold on to what feels like home.
Then let your leaves fall,
The big and the small,
Be open to what you’ll be shown.
PAUSE
Now I know you’ll want,
To figure it out,
Your mind wants it all to make sense.
You just have to trust,
And give up the hunt,
Be open to what spirit presents.
PAUSE
The undoing of you,
Release, release, release.
Just be here right now,
And open yourself to peace.
LONG PAUSE
Now what will transpire,
Is that your new desires,
Will slowly bubble up to your heart.
Piece by piece it’ll come,
Soon you won’t feel undone,
You’ll be clear on exactly what you want.
PAUSE
In order to evolve,
You must dissolve,
The old you that no longer fits in this space.
But it will take time,
For this new design,
Flood yourself with patience and grace.
PAUSE
The undoing of you,
Unraveling what no longer is you.
Shed your old skin,
Open to hearing your new truth.
LONG PAUSE
What about you?
Have you been going through a season of Undoing? Or can you remember when you have? What are you learning? What do you need?
Remember that we always have meditations at your fingertips to help you find more calm, clarity and peace ???????? ???? Women’s Meditation Network
Namaste, Beautiful…
???? Katie
Namaste, Beautiful…????
Katie Krimitsos
Creator of the Women’s Meditation Network
katie@womensmeditationnetwork.com
